What To Do After An Argument
Ever walk away from an argument with your partner thinking, “Now what?” You’re both still stewing, the energy is tense, and no one’s quite sure how to make the next move. That’s exactly why I want to talk about repair rituals—the small, intentional ways couples reconnect after a fight.
Why Repair Matters
Fights don’t destroy relationships—disconnection does. What makes the real difference is how you circle back to each other. After a disagreement, you need something that says, “We’re still okay.”
Think of a repair as a bridge. It doesn’t erase the conflict, but it gets you emotionally back on the same side.
3 Types of Repair Rituals You Can Try
Verbal Repairs
A simple phrase like “I hate when we fight like this—I love you even when I’m mad,” can go a long way. In my house, it’s “Are you good, grumpy pants?” (It’s an inside joke.)Physical Repairs
Some people need a hug, a hand-hold, or just sitting close. No words—just physical closeness to signal, I’m still here.Action-Based Repairs
This could be a sticky note on the mirror, making coffee, or a little text that says, “Still love you.” Small gestures, big impact.
How Do You Start?
Talk about it when you’re not in conflict. Ask each other: What helps you feel close again after a fight? Make repairs a normal part of your relationship.
Expect some awkwardness if this is new. Do it anyway.
Repairs don’t mean surrender. They mean you’re choosing the relationship over the argument, so don't let your pride or ego get in the way of the olive branch, accept the repair attempt—even if you’re still hurt. You can still circle back later to resolve lingering issues.
One More Thing…
Sometimes, a quick hug or kind word is enough. Other times, especially if the fight was intense or unresolved, you may need to revisit the issue and do a deeper repair. We’ll talk about that another time.
For now? Just start. Leave the sticky note. Crack a joke. Reach for the hand. Build the bridge.
If you found this helpful, share it with your partner so you can both start building your own repair rituals.
If arguments in your relationship leave you feeling drained, disconnected, or like you’re one fight away from giving up—don’t wait for things to magically get better. My coaching program is designed for couples who are trying, but are stuck in communication chaos. Let’s change that.
👉 Book A Call to learn how Communication Coaching for Couples, can help you, because your relationship deserves more.